The shop is now closed to all orders outside the UK.



About Rude Botany

Rude Botany

Who would have thought the safe and cosy life of the plant world could be so downright RUDE?  However, the slogans of these shiny new t-shirts are actually the REAL botanical names for plants!

Our Carry On-esque selection includes eye openers such as ‘Rubus cockburnianus’, ‘Lilium superbum’ and ‘Clitoria ternatea’! All t-shirts come in bang-on trend colours such as Flame Orange, Sun Yellow and Kelly Green… to name a few. 

Available from £20 for the guys and the girls, these naughty t-shirts won’t break the bank either! Not a bad price for a chance to gain a bit of plant knowledge AND bring a smirk to a face or two! Hort-smut rules!

But, remember… it’s not RUDE, it’s BOTANY

Shop the Rude Botany collection

Anyone who has attended horticultural college will know how much hilarity surrounds this member of the bramble family! It’s shocking, but it’s just a plant name. You’ll have fun explaining it to people...

It’s horticultural smut at its best - wear it and be proud! The Clitoria is only for the very brave though...



Who would have thought the safe and cosy life of the plant world could be so downright RUDE?  However, the slogans of these shiny new t-shirts are actually the REAL botanical names for plants!

It’s all so very innocent, give yourself a chance to learn a new language today! The language of (rude) plants.

YES, they are real plants!

Crassula vaginata
Clitoria ternatea is a vining plant originating in tropical Asia Crassula vaginata: A succulent plant from Africa with sprays of yellow flowers
Lilium Superbum Narcissus assoanus
Lilium superbum is one of the grandest Lilies, superb even! Sometimes known as the American Tiger Lily Narcissus assoanus is a Spanish daffodil which is only a few inches tall, but the blooms are super fragrant
Phallus impudicus Phallus impudicus
Phallus impudicus is named for its shape, it smells a bit funky though, grow with caution! Philadelphus erectus is an easy to grow shrub that has orange-fragranced flowers
Phallus impudicus Rosa Golden Showers
Prunus 'fukubana' is a Japanese flowering cherry with a parade of colour each spring Rosa 'Golden Showers' is a wild rose which can cope with a wide range of situations, including coastal gardens
Rubus cockburnianus Milk Thistle
Rubus cockburnianus is grown for its vivid, white winter branches, and perhaps has the most amusing name of any plant! Also known as Milk Thistle, Silybum has spiky, silver edged foliage and showy blooms

 

Help the fight against cancer

As you know, rude botany T-shirts are adorned with REAL botanical names for plants, which are a little risqué. However, not only are they educational and fun, now they will be helping in the fight against male cancer too!

We are proud to announce that we will be joining forces with the Orchid Male Cancer Charity.

Orchid is the UK’s leading charity working on behalf of anyone affected by or interested in male cancer – prostate, testicular and penile. Established in 1996 by testicular cancer patient, Colin Osborne MBE and the oncologist who saved his life, Professor Tim Oliver, Orchid exists to save men’s lives from male cancer through a range of support services, education and awareness campaigns and a pioneering research programme.

10% from each sale of our three selected t-shirts, Philadelphus erectus, Rubus cockburnianus and Phallus impudicus, will be donated to the Orchid Charity.

Rebecca Porta, Orchid’s Chief Executive commented:

“Orchid is delighted that Rude Botany is supporting the charity by making a donation from sales of their T-shirts. Incidence of male cancer is increasing every year and more people than ever before are turning to us for support and information. Sales of selected Rude Botany T-shirts will raise much needed funds to improve the outlook for men affected by prostate, testicular and penile cancer and will help us fight male specific cancers.”

Hort smut really does rule!